Party of 12

We had our evening meals promptly

served at 6:00.

Every day mom prepared food for the

family including two grandmothers who

lived with us.

That’s a lot of people to feed all at once

and the tables varied from formal dining

to a picnic table in the kitchen. Extra leaves

were a mainstay. On special occasions, the

ping-pong table was moved in to the dining

room, covered with fresh white linens, fine

Haviland china, crystal water glasses,

insignia silver and seating place cards.

At that time, little ones sat on phone books

to reach the table. Lazy Susan turntables

were an essential and definitely no elbows

on the table.

We all said grace before dinner and never

missed the gratuity of  ‘Thank you mother,

it was very good.’

Another reality was the tension at mealtime.

The differences of opinion, personal issues,

strife among the ranks, hardly any elbow

room, tears and sometimes arguments.

With this other guest at the table, sometimes

I could not eat. The anxiety of it all made meals

a potential battleground. I could not wait to get

up…may I please be excused was the proper

exit question.

I share this to invite the option of what mealtime

can be for the greatest good.

From my perspective, sharing in the shopping,

chopping, preparation and serving is the best.

Everyone knows what goes in to the provisions

and takes part in the goodness.

Even if it a simple meal—setting the table with

love, some fresh or potted flowers, and time for

each person to share their thoughts without

judgment makes mealtime something to look

forward to, rather than avoided. It’s an essential

ingredient to happy eating and living.

Giving thanks in the form of a prayer is one way

to start. The other is to thank all who prepared

the meal with specific praise. The centerpiece

is reverent respect, including yourself.

You picked the most delicious corn today.

I love how you cook the pasta so perfectly al dente.

The plating was beautiful, you really arrange things

nicely.

With this small change to mealtime, it goes from an

estranged party of 12, to a party of joy in no time. A

celebration, food and family united, even if it’s just

a party of one.

Invite yourself to slow down, light a candle, enjoy the

taste of what’s on your plate and give yourself plenty

of elbow room to experience what you have made.

Life is delicious!

TIP: Plates and bowls don’t have to match. Let each

person pick out their own place setting. When it’s

time to clear the table and wash up, have each person

wash their own. Pans, prep bowls and cutting board

duty can be shared, or assigned by the day or week.